The wind was icy. The games were hard-fought and riveting. The tension was palpable. The ladder positions at the end of the day were … unchanged.

Yes, for the first time in, like, ever, each playing entity occupied the same ladder position at the end of Round 5 as it had prior to the commencement of the day’s play.

It emerged that Better than Charles was not better than Burley Hurlers, at least not on this occasion, succumbing 3-7 at Chidley Point Reserve.

The aforementioned Hurlers were less good in their other game, losing 5-7 to Athletes for Life.

Rawalpindi Express, representing AFL sans Banker and Buzz Lightbeer, lost AFL’s other game, capitulating to Motherchucker in another 5-7 result.

Even though Gonad turned up, he still managed a forfeit-like scoreline against Second XI (Reg and Andy playing without Cannonball).

Speaking of forfeits, Second XI reaped the benefits of neither of the Dukes of Normandy turning up, accruing another 7-0 result.