The softness of the sodden turf in East Perth in round 4 meant that a large number of tossed cods disappeared beneath the grass. With many cods partly or completely hidden from view, it was harder than usual to measure distances without a divining rod. Some cods were very hard to find and, when eventually located, had to be coaxed from their muddy burrows with gentle music and tasty treats.

Two Fingers of Scotch made light of the heavy conditions, whipping Motherchucker 8-5 and CBGBs (Banker and Gonad minus Cannonball) 7-5.

That performance saw them climb from second place on the ladder to first, taking the Singular Singleton Reg down a peg in the process. Reg had only one game but claimed to have finished the round 100% victorious, prevailing over Psychoceramics (playing Bradless) 7-5.

At the press conference after the round, Reg opined that it was a shame that President Brad wasn’t there, because it might have been good for Brad to get used to defeat ahead of the presidential elections.

The “Crackpots”, however, did enjoy the sweet taste of success, with a convincing 7-1 win over Big Pineapple, who has stolen last place from RE.

Motherchucker, sporting a fetching sealskin jacket and new Ted Snell glasses, compounded BP’s woes with another 7-1 whumping.

Rawalpindi Express was able to clamber up a rung from last place, with a healthy 7-0 win over CBGBs.

The Stingers were represented by Stella (as Barney and Buzz Lightbeer had RDOs) and Stella put paid to RE’s planned recovery, eclipsing him 7-4.