Sporting Viking helmets and shields to commemorate the Battle of Svolder, the warriors of the AATBL took over Rottnest Island for the last round of the 2016 home-and-away season. While some tourists fled in terror at the sight of the Viking warriors, others posed for selfies and clamoured for autographs.

The games were played on the grassed area to the north of the bakery. There was a variety of surfaces, including grassy slopes, tree roots, uneven dirt, all of which had a liberal sprinkling of quokka poo. The areas were punctuated by limestone walls that are probably heritage-listed, but none of the walls was harmed by the wannabe Vikings lobbing steel balls about.

The were a few absentees on the day. Banker was absent, leaving RE to fly solo for the Jolly Rogers. The Ball Boys played without Cannonball and Buzz (ie: only Reg played). The Dirty Three failed to field a team at all, bringing into sharp focus the controversial circumstances of the season’s opening round. The Dirty Three, formerly known as iBocce, had also failed to field a player in the first round. Instead of their games in that round being played by proxy, thereby exhausting the team’s ability to play by proxy again in the season, the fixtures were mysteriously adjusted, so that the Dirty Three played no games, thereby preserving their proxy card. It is not clear whether any money changed hands. In any event, it was fortunate for them, because they would not otherwise have been able to play by proxy at Rotto.

The Inscrotables took two from two, demolishing the improxified Dirty Three 7-0 and the sole Jolly Roger, RE, 7-4. That 7-4 result was crucial to both teams, as the Jolly Rogers thereby managed to hang onto the top of the ladder, taking the minor premiership ahead of The Inscrotables by 0.66%. Rawalpindi Express also managed a come-from-behind win against the Flying Pigs, prevailing 7-5, after being down 5-1.

Although the Pigs played three games, they could only win one, slipping to fourth on the ladder. They beat the cellar-dwelling Pittsburgh Stealers 7-5, but lost 3-8 to the proxies of the Dirty Three.

Ball Boy Reg won two from two, dispatching the Squealers 7-1 and the Dirty Three (by proxy) 7-5.

Mochu is the only member of the Squealers who has never held the Asti. Stella is the only Squealer who has not been Grand Bocce. The finals await.